So today it’s official.
It will be officially announced later today that my dad’s gonna be the president at the University of Alabama Huntsville. No word on whether my mom will be officially proclaimed the first lady. All the lead up info can be found here. This means my folks are leaving Bethlehem for northern Alabama this summer.
<———To live here.
Though we moved around a lot as kids (Australia, Britain, Sweden, New Mexico) we always had the house in the Hem. It expanded a bit, TV couches came and went, and the basement became somewhat of a vortex for action figures and Nerf products, but at least it was in the same place.
Thing is, when I moved to Africa, I had no idea when I left that house, that it might be the last time I’d leave it as my home.
(That was just a plea for international sympathy. Don’t buy into it.)
See, in actuality, it’s all quite fitting:
A: Matt has settled in NYC, foregoing a career of penthouses, money, women, bullet proof cars, and government glad-handing as an oil exec, to instead save the world one MySpace-addicted child at a time. Honestly, he’s gotta be the most educated babysitter on the face of the earth.
B: Steve is graduating from a second-rate Ivy League wanna-be institution with his degree in Civil Engineering (just a step up from Art History), and will most likely move to DC. Mols, Varn, Burch, Portia: alert all females in the area to be ready for bad pick-up lines.
If you’ve been reading CHNEPR at all, you might have a vague idea about me. But just in case you don’t know, I am a war profiteer exploiting indigenous peoples for my own professional gain.
So losing my boyhood home is not a sad thing at all. It’s monumental. It’s a turning point in the family. Truth be told, I’m really proud of the old man. He’s worked with one employer his entire career, living in—or always coming back to—Bethlehem for more than 30 years. He’s at least 70-something. Maybe 80. I don’t really know, I mean, he’s just old; like Charlton Heston old. He was totally gonna retire, travel, yell “get off my lawn” at whippersnappers, and tell everyone how good things used to be. Maybe buy a Winnebago or something. But now he’s leaving it all behind for an incredible opportunity.
Through it all, I’d like to think he followed my lead, you know, making a drastic career change.
In all honesty, way to go Pops. It’s gonna be a serious adjustment, and big change to the family dynamic, but we’re 100% behind you.
It’s frickin awesome.
I know The Babysitter and Art-History agree.
A few clarifications:
It’s not the Crimson Tide, bro, it’s the Chargers. Kinda like how UCLA is the Bruins, and UC Santa Cruz is the Banana Slugs.
My folks will keep the abode in Bethlehem for the time being, but when I do return to the States, I will most likely be returning to ‘Bama. It’s been a good long run at McGrady’s
I am very much looking forward to wearing a beater to bars, wearing overalls with no shirts, and learning to play the banjo.