Marmaduke Explained

September 27, 2006

I really enjoyed all of the explanations:

Markaduke explained


Going to the Nairobi Gym

September 27, 2006

One of the guys who’d driven me about the first week approached me one day a week or two ago and said, “William(s). You have mp3?”

“A few…” I replied. My collection has been closing in on 11,000 for the past few months, but I didn’t want to sound ostentatious.

“You have more than one? Could I borrow one?”

I realized immediately that he was talking about an MP3 player, not my music collection. Now, whilst I am in possession of a shuffle and a 60gig 5G iPod, the latter happens to be one of my more prized possessions. “What’s going on that do you need to borrow it?

“I am driving to Rumbek. It is a 14 hour drive. The truck has no radio.”

I’d rather eat my 60gigger than loan it out, but I couldn’t find a reason not to let him borrow my shuffle. It was falling apart, and new models were just introduced. But it had sentimental value. I let my comrade borrow the 512 mb player, but I had a sinking feeling I’d never see my beloved shuffle again.

– – – –

I had mentioned the luxury of the washer and dryer in my apartment in Vegas, but there was also a little gym with treadmills, ellipticals, a few machines, and free weights. Though nothing compared to some hotel gyms like Vail Cascade and Hammock beach, it was nice to come home and get a work out in every now and then.

I’d only ever used my shuffle for working out and as a back if I forgot to charge my pod the night before.

But I’ve been getting used to running with the full sized.

On Sunday I woke up, walked out my gate, and was surprised to see the Jockey Club bustling with life. Yellow and black balloons lined the car park that actually had cars in it. I discovered later that an antique car show was being held. It was sort of an appetizer event for the races starting october 8th, ushering in the summer.

Yeah, that’s right: my summer is just starting.

When I heard about this car show after the fact, I was disappointed for having missed it. But then I realized I probably wouldn’t have gone to an antique car show in the States, so no big deal. Besides I had plans for the afternoon

But I digress.

I can remember when I lived in NYC I went running once while smoking a cigarette just because I thought I was funny. I knew someone would go home, and say, “Honey, you’ll never believe what I saw today…”

Here, with people milling about my route, I got looks more like, “Why do you need to run?”

My Maasai guards seem to get a kick out of it.

They all probably have cousins who can run marathons barefoot.

So while jogging hasn’t been too difficult, lifting has been a bit of an issue. Weights are really expensive, and traveling around with them would be ludicrous.

So I’ve been improvising:

Nairobi Gym

It’s amazing: the level of depravity I’m willing to share with the world.

The hardest part isn’t curling as much as it’s not hitting yourself in the nuts.

John Basedow, chairs are the real fitness made simple.

– – – –

I still haven’t gotten my shuffle back.

Watch Out For the OLPotW to Start Looking a Lot Better.

September 22, 2006

Is this right? I mean, like, morally.

HP Slimming Camera

HP has just released a camera with a ‘slimming feature.’

Maybe if I used that I wouldn’t look like a land monster at this barThe Winning Post

I’m second from the left.

September 21, 2006

Expat interviews ScreenshotFrom the Good Lord I Cannot Believe They Actually Posted This News Department, just posted my answers to their questions.


I’m glad they have a sense of humour over there.

McDonalds to Serve Breakfast All Day

September 21, 2006

McDonalds Nevah ProspahsFrom the It’s About Frickin Time News Department, expanded layouts for new McDonald’s restaurants will enable all day breakfast service.

You’d think they would learned long ago from Michael Douglas.

Enjoy this in the states. There are (thankfully) no McD’s in Kenya or Sudan.

Shot in the Dark

September 20, 2006

Nairobi guard with runguI was out late last night.

More on that later.

But at around two in the morning, just as I’d crawled into bed, I was awoken by a loud noise.

No, that couldn’t have been gunfire.

The second shot confirmed my suspicion.

As I found out today at work, it was the armed guards of the Jockey Club in reponse to an attempted break in. No one was injured, but the criminals were not caught.


This guy manages to keep a machete, a bow and arrow, a rungu, and a very sharp stick on his person.

I’m not too worried.

But my mom is gonna totally freak over this post.

Online Personality of the Week: Julius

September 20, 2006

Julius is not actually Julius.

He’s named Anthony.

He’s gay, drives a Saab Mustang, and likes tai chi podcasts.

Anthony is not actually Anthony.

He’s Bruce Campbell.